While on exchange in France, I grew close to some of the other fellow exchange students. The group comprised of students from Brazil, Mexico, Sweden, and Italy. We often spent our weekends combing the alleys of Lyon for new sights and eating-places.
On our virgin adventure in an old Lyonnaise restaurant, I asked some of the friends around me if I could try their food. Immediately, I noticed some discomfort in their faces and voices as they replied with an uncertain ‘yes’.
My other Singaporean friend on the other hand, was gladly helping herself to the others’ food, not realizing no one else was taking from her plate. She was also voraciously ‘attacking’ her chicken main course, putting the chicken parts in her mouth and sucking all the meat off the bone before spitting the chicken bones out.
Eventually, the other international students around her started looking visibly annoyed and stopped eating, and subsequently stopped making conversation altogether. Some had very disgusted looks on their faces. The meal ended in awkward silence, prompting an early return to school. On the way back to school, my Singaporean friend and I felt rather excluded from the rest.
The incident left me rather perturbed, as these were people I considered myself close to. My friend and I were wondering if the rest were being mean, or perhaps even racist to the only two Asians in the group.
Ironically, over some beer later in the week, I asked the Swedish girl about the others' reactions and learnt that in some of their cultures, they were not used to sharing their dishes. Main courses were considered personal, unless it was a picnic or ‘tapas’ session. Hence, they found having someone stick a fork into their food extremely offensive. This was certainly different from our way of sharing food. They also found the act of eating the chicken to the bone extremely repulsive. This was confirmed after checking with some of the others. In that sense, they were very open and forthcoming with their opinions without being personal. Mindful of the others’ preferences, we were more careful about our mealtime etiquette after that.
六弄咖啡館
8 years ago